It Wasn’t A Bad Year

in this life, if you want to make it, you have to move with audacity.

I remember crying into 2024.

I was in a fight with someone I really loved and even though I knew it was my fault, I refused to apologise because I felt like the fight was what I needed to finally walk away from a friendship that was draining me.

The friend and I finally talked things through. I apologised and we re-evaluated our friendship but that didn’t happen until late January, 2024.

So basically, my 2024 didn’t start great and I assumed it would shape my entire year. How wrong I was. It definitely had its rough moments but was it a bad year?

In today’s letter, I’ll be honest about my 2024 journey. The good, the very bad and the frighteningly ugly and hopefully, you might learn a thing or two.

Some things in this letter will make sense, others will not.

On Career.

At the beginning of 2024, I was transitioning from an old management to a new one. Although I loved my old manager, I thought I needed somewhere with more structure, so I made the move.

I was utterly scared because as soon as I joined, they began to move like I was a superstar and I was like abeg oooo, hold on oh. I am still a small girl please but instead of hitting the brakes, they pressed accelerator.

I was just in the car like this.

Please match brake nau

I came to learn that - in this life, if you want to make it, you have to move with audacity.

Be audacious in your thinking. I also slowly started to learn that perception is everything. If you want people to rate you highly, you have to rate yourself highly first.

If you ask for a first class ticket on a work trip but you don’t regularly fly first class, they’ll be less inclined to book you the first class trip. However, if you regularly fly first class anyway, it wouldn’t even be a conversation.

Side note: I have never flown first class, that was just an example but I do want to fly first this year.

Coming from someone who hasn’t been out of the continent in three years, that’s quite a bold statement, right?

Yes. Be Audacious.

I remember saying I wanted to write more scripts this year and I did. I wrote a full 7 episode series. It will be out next year and I’m really looking forward to it.

I didn’t accomplish all my goals this year as I really wanted to be on a writing team for Netflix but we win some and we lose some, don’t we?

On Friendships

Up until 2023, I had a weird relationship with friendships. I was scared people didn’t love me and even more terrified of making new friends. I think it stemmed from the fact that my parents made me very wary of people and kept me indoors for most of my childhood. This turned me into a shy, socially anxious person.

This year, I leaned into my old friendships and things got better. I was more vulnerable. I didn’t listen to my brain when it told me I wasn’t loved. I chose to take people at their word when they told me they cared about me.

And boy was I right because this year, my friends planned a surprise birthday party for me. I would never have imagined that they’d do that for me.

I did not suspect a damn thing because I just assumed my friends didn’t care that much. But they do. And I shed tears like a baby. Me, hard girl.

On Money

LMAOOOO

In 2022, I said money was such a hard subject for me to talk about and man, it still is. It’s very hard for me to spend money and instead, I save. I think this is because my family went from middle class to lower class very quickly and it taught me that life could change within the blink of an eye.

My younger brothers suffered a lot because my dad lost his job while they were still in school and I hated that.

So to atone for being the one that chopped my father’s money when there was money, there is nothing I would not do for my brothers.

This year, I funded both their travel plans and put mine on the back burner for them.

I am willing to do anything for the people I love but when it is time for me to spend on myself. Problem. I am learning to fix that.

If you have this problem, please tackle in 2025. Spoil yourself!

On Wins

I bought a car.

On Mental Health

It’s difficult for me to admit this but just so you know how bad my mental health was, I starved myself on purpose because I didn’t think I deserved nourishment. Lmao.

I finally started therapy but stopped after one session.

I’m still not in a great place mentally and I am trying to find my way but I don tire, make I no lie.

On Love

I have been in love with one person since 2022. This could be beautiful or pathetic, depending on the way you look at it.

On Heartbreak.

I am still on this journey.

On Pain

My friends are truly a blessing but I was at my loneliest this year. It’s always been hard for me to reach out to people when I need to cry and as a result, I cried alone many times this year.

I lost two people that meant the world to me. My best friend was one of those. Her death in 2023 shook me to my core.

I already knew how to be alone but I had to learn how to be okay with it.

The death of my best friend will always hurt me. I don’t think it will ever stop hurting. I have made my peace with it. It will always be a constant pain but I know she is resting in peace. Until we meet again.

I have also come to understand that pain is a constant part of life. Even on days that are sweet, I know pain will come but I also know that joy, too, is a constant part of life. The night is always darkest just before dawn.

I love you so much, Temi. You lit up my world and I can’t wait to meet you again.

On Self

Whooshhhh. For a minute there, I lost myself. I didn’t take care of myself and looked like all the problems I was going through. I want to do better this year. Eat well, take my vitamins, dress better, walk with so much confidence, learn a new language and live my best life.

On Rejection

How I felt about rejections in 2022 is still how I feel going into 2025. I didn’t experience enough of them this year.

I think I missed out on some opportunities because I didn’t put myself out there.

With more rejections come more wins and lessons. Rejection means you tried and that’s better than someone that didn’t even try at all.

On Disappointments

The only disappointment I faced was from myself because when I was supposed to japa, I didn’t and look at me today.

Struggling with Tinubu and his band of miscreants.

Oh well, someone did disappoint me this year and it hurt me to my bone but I forgave them.

On Forgiveness

On second thought, I do not forgive anybody. If we have beef, best believe it is going into 2025 with me.

On Negativity

I had such an experience with negativity this year. I was opened up to a lot of bullying, death and rape threats this year. I think it toughened me up and also allowed me to focus on the love I have. I also realised that unfortunately, this is the price of putting yourself out there. Especially on social media.

But the only way to slurp the tears of your haters to be even more successful and in 2025, our bag is going to be heavy.

On 2025

Next year, I want travel. I want to be audacious. I want to live. I want to laugh loudly and feel the wind in my hair. I want to invest in myself. I want to stop waiting for people to fund my projects and start doing the things I can do. I want to take on the world, quite literally. I want to make more money. I want to stop being anxious. It’ll also be nice to move in with a man (but my mother will kill me if this does not come with a ring lmao).

On Happiness

I’d rate my happiness a 7/10. I’m at a better place this year. And I think that’s a win.

So it really wasn’t a bad year. Alhamdulilah.

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Thank you for reading this far. I love you and I’m grateful for this community.

How was your 2024? What are you looking forward to in 2025? I’ll be in the comments.

Oh I have dilemmas. Please help.

1. My friend is having his 40th birthday next year in Kenya. The birthday will go on for 3 days. He has invited me and I have to book my ticket in January but the bash is happening towards the end of Ramadan. Do I go or not?

2. A popular actress (and her useless boyfriend) stole my work in 2022 and after blatantly denying it and trying to bully me, I got a lawyer involved and she folded. I was compensated. Fast forward to now, someone has asked me to be on set with this woman. Do I take it or pass up the opportunity?

3. I want to marry a billionaire this year, how do I do it?

The last song of the year is True Love by Pink. Thank you for sticking with me in 2024. 🤎