Our Comic Book Is Out Tomorrow & My Father Is An Opp

I frowned at him. Who injure this one? Who be this one?

Good afternoon to everyone who has pre-ordered the comic book I wrote. If you haven’t pre-ordered, click here to buy and come back to meet me for your greetings.

But seriously guys, I feel so much relief because the book is finally coming out tomorrow. I started putting a team together for this book in November 2022 and knowing that it’ll be released tomorrow is doing too many things to me.

To the people who bought it immediately I announced, thank you so much! And to the ones who bought after the announcement, thank you again! And to those who haven’t yet bought it, thank you! 

Because you will soon buy, AMEN!

This is the last day it will be N4,500 so please buy.

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Now, to the newsletter topic of the day.

I think my father is my opp.

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My cousin, who lives in the US, recently got engaged to her boyfriend, Abdel, and they came back to Nigeria for the proper family introduction.

They chose to take my parents out for breakfast at Oriental Hotel and I carried my head and went with them. It was a breakfast buffet and I, in my great wisdom, thought that since the purpose of the breakfast was for Abdel to get to know my parents, no attention will be paid to me.

So I started eating like a fool.

Abdel saw my plate and started asking me nonsense questions that I didn’t bother to answer because is it me you came to introduce yourself to? Please face your in-laws.

In the middle of all my chewing, a man rushed towards us, pulled out a chair beside me and addressed the group with, “My meeting finished earlier than I expected.”

He was clearly out of breath with how heavily he was breathing and how he panted those words. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead despite the cool weather and even colder air conditioning in the restaurant. He rolled up the sleeves of his white shirt as my cousin asked if he took the stairs again.

“If I can’t go to the gym because of my injury, I might as well work out with the stairs.”

I frowned at him. Who injure this one? Wait. Who be this one sef?

He greeted my parents and stretched out his hand to me for a handshake.

“I’m Abdel’s brother. Omar”

Ah.

With my mouth full and right hand holding a croissant, I streched out my left hand and managed to mumble something. It was an awkward handshake because I know he was wondering why I didn’t just drop the croissant.

Drop it kor.

“Hauwa, this is my brother. Your cousin was telling him about you”, Abdel added.

Now, quick backstory.

My cousin had mentioned that Abdel’s brother was around but she had told me he wasn’t coming to this breakfast. I was supposed to meet him at the general introduction but apparently, his meeting finished on time and he made it.

It’s not like I’m ashamed of the amount of food I can consume on a norm, it is just that the food I had in front of me was actually too much. I had planned to roll some up in some serviette to take home.

How can I be eating like a goat? That too, in front of the boy they want to set me up with?

Omar pointed at the food and asked if it was all for me. My father helped me answer because I was still struggling with the process of chewing and swallowing the content of my mouth.

“It is all her own. That’s how she eats.”

This man keeps hounding me about marriage and this is what he does to the first person that considers wifing me up? Definitely an opp.

At the end of the breakfast, everyone dispersed and finally alone in the car with my parents, I asked my dad why he threw me under the bus at breakfast and he said, “So they can marry you and you’ll go there and finish all their food? Ikan (termite)”

See? A certified opp.

Anyway, Omar is in the country for 2 more weeks. You may start choosing your aso-ebi as I work on him.

I will soon be off the market. 💍👰🏾‍♀️

Buy my comic book or you’re not coming for my wedding. The End.