Living Alone Can Be Hard
So how do you do it?
This letter is a short question.
How do you live alone?
It’s been a lazy Sunday and even though I have a million and one things to get to, I’ve spent most of my day in bed. Alone. Without saying a word. The only noise I’ve heard today has been from my phone and the overspilling tank on my roof.
My friend will probably call me before the day is over and that will be the only conversation I’d have today.
The rest will be with myself. I both love and hate it. Living alone forces you to have honest conversations with yourself. It forces you to introspect. And if you’re not satisfied with your life, it constantly reminds you.
And my brain is both my best friend and worst enemy.
When you live alone, there’s nobody to remind you to eat, nobody to help do the dishes you didn’t do last night, cleaning is entirely on you if you can’t outsource it, something breaks? You fix it alone. There’s no-one to quickly gist with. You might call your friend but nothing beats someone being physically there.
To top it off, my estate is so quiet.
So in my life is a silent calm but also a frustrating stillness.
Living alone wasn’t a conscious decision. It just happened.
To explain, I should be living with my friend but due to some circumstances, she was unable to stay with me and so, I ended up staying by myself.
On some days, I am so happy to be by myself and on other days, I am bored out of my mind. I also hate going out, so I’m stuck in my house.
My parents keep telling me to come by the house in Ikorodu but the last time I went, I fell down from okada in Agric and vulcanizers had to reset my leg for me so I’m definitely not going back anytime soon.
I need pointers.
People who live alone, how do you do it?
I rushed here this moment I saw title of this mail.
I live alone. Honestly it could be the most frustrating thing and the best thing ever.
I enjoy being by myself but sometimes it’s just to much. Nothing beats having someone to talk to physically but nothing beats living alone either.
How I do it? I just live. I’m currently in my boyfriends house, when I’m tired I’ll be back to my place. Anytime I get back to my place I’m always so happy that I have it all to myself.
One of the worst things is being broke and alone😂 like Goddddddd!!!!!!!!!! You won’t know if you’re sad because you’re alone or sad because you’re broke or both. There’s the feeling that had it been you had company, at least it would have been easier to cope with the “brokeness”
God help us. I no even get television to help my life😂 at least it’s enough distraction till I get tired of it or no more subscription money. Then it’s “eh God” “God abeg” “God when” 😂😂😂😂😂
Start with building a pattern. Set rules that align with your daily, weekly and monthly needs (needs be very very different from goals óò). Tip, align with your daily prayers for starters.
Next, set your smart watch (I'm guessing it's your apple watch - big geh) for 3 reminders - each one for your daily meals. Solid tip, once you carry your plates to the kitchen, don't leave until you do the dishes.
This one may be hard but, sleep on time. This leaves your mind quiet/unconscious during those lonely evenings - so no more kindly thoughts. Plus you wake up feeling refreshed.
Add a workout routine - space it out. I suggest 1 morning, every other morning (i.e., if you workout on Sunday, then you don't on Monday; on and off, you get?). On the third morning (this workout day), do your routine outside (jogging works). This introduces you to new and random elements.
Notice that all these suggestions don't take you too far from home (don't worry, I know your kind - home body them them) so they should be relatively easy to adopt.
These suggestions may seem counter Intuitive; she say she dey lonely, this one dey give her routine. Lol yes! With my full chest. Just try it...