63 Comments

There's always something about being a girl/woman.

Suddenly, a girl has to behave proper to fill in the void of whatever uncouth character a boy has just to keep the house in one peace.

This life as far as I am concerned is meant to be lived with happiness and free from all sorts of entitlement.

What remains of our lives if we spend it living in view of someone else's?

Thank you so much, Hauwa 🥂

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As always, well said Hauwa. After my test this afternoon, I will go to a random superstore, treat myself to junks and then consume everything at Iftar while reminiscing on your words. I’m a few years away from my 20s but, I look forward to standing in my own kitchen, doing my dishes and blasting my neighbors’ ears with my loud music. And randomly making plans to go on solo trips to a place of my choice because I will not be Iya Lola or Ade’s wife, I will be just Nadiah, her mother’s daughter.

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Don’t blast your neighbor’s ears with music. Don’t do it. It’s a behavior that makes me swear for people, honestly

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“Nadiah, why are you disturbing your neighbors with loud music?”

*chuckles in independent woman. 😌

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This had me chuckle a bit. Nice one

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Well said Hauwa👏🏾

We grow up in an environment where we're always reminded of our responsibilities...this makes us forget to live in the moment and enjoy the life while creating beautiful memories.

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Mar 25
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Thank youu

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Definitely reading this again cause it resonates…

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This is absolutely beautiful, and the next time I'm sitting by myself in fuzzy sucks and staring at the stars from my balcony, I'll be sure to savour it a little longer. Thank you, Hauwa!

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As someone with a wife and kids now. As I love them dearly - I also miss the feeling sometimes of loving for yourself. Take your time, the time you have now will never come back.

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This is such a real feeling. You don’t know that the small luxuries that you enjoy now are only limited. I wish there was a way to know the expiry date on things just so I can treasure them a bit more.

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The beauty in this is the reminder to live the life you want and make decisions for you. Not for society, your parents or for the sake of routine. I needed this …thank you! I cannot wait to cultivate more pockets of joy within my days. Reading this brought me peace 💜

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This period is the best I've experienced so far, even though I'm not fully staying on my own the small pockets of happiness I get from being able to make my own decisions are something I never knew was possible.

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Beautiful words. We totally forget the little things which are even more important.

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Thank you Hauwa❤️

This is beautifully written.

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This is an absolute reminder to live my best alone while I'm alone 🤍. Thank you Hauwa

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This is so relatable Hauwa! I grew up under the high expectations of being a girl child in an African home. You are taught that your life revolves around getting married, always being on your toes, waking up by 4 am, to do chores and live for others. Indulging in yourself is forbidden and being your own person is termed rebellion. It doesn't end there! Even as a married woman, you are told the success and failure of your home lies on you alone! But I am drawing strength from your post! This enriched my morning! Thank you Hauwa! I just subscribed to your newsletter! 💯💕

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I have gotten so used to hearing how you’re responsible for someone else all my life. From taking care of my father, to going to live with my brother and still practicing this same ideology that has been drilled into my head. When I do get a little freedom for myself I forget how to enjoy. Thank you Hauwa for reminding me that inasmuch as we care for others, we should care for ourselves as well.

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Hauwa thank you so much. You don't know how I love your newsletter. You are an absolute gem. Thank you for saying and writing what our parents fail to see or chose to ignore. Love ❤️

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Personally, I think telling your kids about this pocket of life ruins the whole thing. Let them figure it out on their own. That's what makes it fun and worth it.

Well written btw❤️

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